When My Brain Wouldn't Slow Down: Navigating ADHD and an Eating Disorder
By: Katelyn Van Hofwegen, ANAD Intern
For a long time, I thought I just lacked discipline.
I couldn’t focus the way other people did. My thoughts felt loud, scattered, and constant. I would swing between hyper-fixation and complete overwhelm. And when it came to food, my relationship was anything but steady.
What I didn’t understand at the time was that I was living with ADHD—and that it was deeply intertwined with my eating disorder.
The Overlap No One Talks About
ADHD isn’t just about attention. It’s about regulating emotions, impulses, routines, and even hunger cues.
Looking back, I can see how many of my eating disorder behaviors were shaped by that dysregulation:
I would forget to eat for hours, then feel out of control later
I craved structure but couldn’t maintain it
I used food (or restriction) to create a sense of control when my brain felt chaotic
Impulsivity made certain behaviors feel automatic, almost impossible to pause
It wasn’t just about food. It was about trying to manage a nervous system that constantly felt like it was either racing or shutting down.
Control vs. Chaos
Living with ADHD often felt like living in extremes.
My brain wanted stimulation, novelty, and relief from overwhelm. My eating disorder, on the other hand, offered rules, rigidity, and a false sense of control.
At times, that structure felt comforting—like something I could finally “do right.”
But over time, it became another form of chaos. Just quieter. More hidden.
The Shame Loop
One of the hardest parts was the shame.
I told myself:
“Why can’t you just stick to a routine?”
“Why are you so all-or-nothing?”
“Why is this so hard for you?”
I didn’t realize that ADHD was impacting my executive functioning—things like planning meals, remembering to eat, or following through on intentions.
So instead of understanding my brain, I blamed myself.
And that shame fed both my ADHD struggles and my eating disorder.
What Changed in Recovery
Recovery wasn’t just about healing my relationship with food. It was about learning how my brain works—and working with it, not against it.
Some of the shifts that helped me most:
Letting go of perfection: Structure doesn’t have to be rigid to be supportive
External supports: reminders, routines, and systems that reduce mental load
Flexibility over rules: learning to adapt instead of forcing consistency
Compassion: understanding that my struggles weren’t failures—they were signals
I also had to learn that consistency for me might not look like consistency for someone else—and that’s okay.
Final Thoughts
There is so much overlap between ADHD and eating disorders that often goes unrecognized.
And when it’s missed, people are left blaming themselves for patterns that actually make sense.
If this is your experience, I want you to know:
You’re not alone.
Your experience is valid.
And healing is still possible.
Not by forcing yourself into someone else’s version of recovery—but by building one that actually works for you.
